Life As We Know It

After taking care of both boys while my husband was out of town this weekend, I sent him a text last night that went something like this, "Please come home alive tomorrow. I really don't want to be a single mom." I seriously have a new level of respect for single moms. I have no earthly idea how they do it... and stay sane!

Here's a glimpse of my day today (and it's not even 3:00):

-Miraculously wake up before Carter and quickly decide to forgo a few extra minutes of sleep in order to drink my coffee/eat breakfast in the beautiful quiet of the morning.

-Feed both boys. Dress both boys. Shower and dress myself.

-Oh wait, only one boy got fed.

-Give Carter Cheerios to eat in the car.. on the way to the airport.

-Park, go in, and find daddy in the airport.

-Head to Chick fil A for lunch. Wait for Carter to eat all 8, yes 8, of his nuggets.

-Drop daddy off at work.

-Drive to a house in Franklin to drop off formula for baby orphans in Africa.

-Debate whether or not get Starbucks, but decide against it.

-Head home. Change and feed a starving newborn. Change newborn again.

-Realize big brother had an explosion in his diaper (we have majorly regressed on the potty training). Change big brother's nasty diaper.

-Put big brother down for a nap. Clean up his dirty clothes.

-Eat 3 chocolate chip cookies out of the freezer. Immediately regret eating 3. Should have stopped at 2.

-Order 50 free prints via Shutterfly.

-Change Cooper's diaper AGAIN.

-Type a blog one-handed because a certain little someone thinks the only place he belongs is in his mama's arms :)

NOW.. time to brew some decaf Dunkin' Donuts coffee, figure out what to have for dinner, finish laundry, and mop very dirty floors... all before Carter wakes up. I really do love my life. But I'm also REALLY glad my hubby is home!!

Hold On

Five years ago tomorrow my husband (of less than 5 months) and I entered a doctor's office with the expectation of hearing our 12 week old baby's heartbeat. Tragically, we never heard that beautiful sound and instead were left with the silence, the numbing silence, of grief. The days, weeks, and months that followed were dark- so dark that I only know now how devastated and truly depressed I really was. It took a long time to heal and, as with any wound, I will always bear the scars on my heart. I was left with a hole in my soul so vast that only God knows the depths of it. There was an emptiness, a longing, that I knew only He could fill.

Here's the good news though... There is a God who makes everything new. He heals the broken-hearted and offers living water for our dry and thirsty souls. That same God knew what He was doing when He called our babies home. And He also knew that on December 11, 2008 and August 15, 2011 he would bring two little boys into my life that would fill my cup until it was overflowing. He gave me everything I was missing and more.

I don't know what burden you are carrying today, but hold on. Hold on in hope that He will fulfill His promise to work all things together for good.

10 Years

Follow THIS LINK to see 25 of the most powerful 9/11 photos.

Many of them I had never seen before...

And many of them are breathtaking...

In a horrific sort of way.

Let's not forget the lives that were lost 10 years ago today

or the families that are still grieving the loss of those they loved.